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My Capitol One Card

My Black Card

My Platinum Card

My husband’s card

It’d be easiest for me to use your card (funny but not helpful)

Let me inform you of the correct answers for this process:

Master Card

Visa

American Express

Discover

That’s what I’m looking for folks. Nothing else is needed. I could care less what bank issued it, what color it is or what standing you believe it holds for you.

#2. Do you all really keep your wallets and credit cards in your cars?

I find this FASCINATING.

I especially like it when you ask me all kinds of “how safe is my information…” questions after I’ve waited for you to go out to your car to get your wallet.

You’re information is safer with me then it is out your unlocked car buddy.

Just my opinion anyway.

#3. If you call about insurance programs do you really think you can get information without providing information? Have you EVER had any type of insurance before?

Be prepared to give your name, address, dob, phone # and any other personal information. I can not find out what your state offers for you if I don’t know who you are, how old you are or where you live. Really

#4. For The Pranksters.

No, I will not be able to deliver more beer.

No, that sort of language from such a young person is not considered funny by anyone but your10 year old friend.

Yes, I am a big fat ugly woman – if I tell you the truth you’re just going to call me back and I’m really not interested.

Etc etc etc

Here’s the thing – I get paid to answer your call so – whatever dude but, do you really think this is the first time I’ve heard any of this? Is it supposed to shock and amaze me? Do you really think you are the only idiot in the world? Let me tell ya pal – get in line.

What irritates us is that you just knocked our stats down. When you call and call again then we have to work harder to get those calls back so, it pisses us off not because of you but, because of the luck of the draw that we got your call. BTW- most of the time you are rerouted to the same operator you just called unless they received another call in the meantime. If you call me more than once, I’m reporting you. Makes me happy. So go ahead – call again.

#5. When intoxicated do not pick up the phone to order what you just saw on TV.

Not only are you going to wake up feeling awful but in a few weeks you’re going to receive something you probably didn’t want in the first place. The person assisting you with your order is soooo not interested in your life history, your problems, your snoring, or anything else so, let’s just pass out instead – okay?

You’re one of those people who does the drunk 3am calls to old loves aren’t you?

JUST DON’T PICK UP THE PHONE. Trust me.